I can’t stand “weight loss” entertainment shows

Extreme Weight Loss: How the most obese nation on earth makes itself feel good by publicly shaming the worst of us

I’m very glad the stack of routers and switches next to me is almost loud enough to drown out the TV. My wife is watching Extreme Weight Loss and I wanted to slap the “guest loser” about 30 seconds into it. (Queue sob story about how her entire family done her wrong when she was most vulnerable…)
Then they pulled the predictable and over-the-top “You’re exercising for the first time in 20 years. You’re sweaty, out of breath and straining like you’re giving birth again. Now while you strain against this weight, tell us why you’re mad at each member of your family. Great! You’re completely out of breath, drenched in sweat, face is completely red, you’re angry and crying. Now, tell us whom you’re the maddest at of all?” (Spoiler warning: she’s slightly less than pleased with herself. Bet you could have guessed that already, right?)

Oh, and the weight loss reveals, where the giant scale takes 10 seconds to “add up” how much the loser has lost this interval, piss me off. Especially when they start the “reveal”, explain what they weighed when they started, what they weighed at the last weigh in, how much they lost the first interval, how much they had to lose this time, and the overly dramatic “If you weigh less than XXX pounds today (pause) you’ve met your goal!” (because they, and the audience, can’t do math?) They step on, the scale takes 5 seconds to count down and…. ad break!
Break’s over. Let’s cover that entire conversation again. Now step on the scale and take 10 seconds to “add up” the weight…

They haven’t gotten to the part where they start discussing how close the “loser” is to having lost enough weight that the surgeon is comfortable performing the skin reduction surgery. As if the weight loss, and the chance for the surgery, actually goes away if they don’t hit that magic number by the end of the 1 hour episode.

I’d be far more interested in what the “losers” from the first season look like today. Did they maintain their magical transformations, or have half of them gone back to their original weight?

Back to this weeks episode: She’s already lost over 100 lbs, she’s down to 160-something and looks fantastic! But the narrator / trainer just said “But, she doesn’t look any different from when I last saw her three months ago in the Bahamas…” Are you kidding me? She hasn’t put on an ounce, looks great, “But she doesn’t look any different…” Fuck you. She’s not 4 feet tall and 160-ish is fat or something. And then you weigh in and she’s lost another 11 lbs and is down to 150? You, Sir, are a DICK. Double douche-bag points to the show for having her go back to her parents, on camera, and confront them with the emotional reconciliation. Either they agreed to this when the producers contacted them and all the on-camera stuff is fake, or they didn’t and you just sandbagged them. People watch this shit and actually believe it’s real?

Just imagine how much I’d be frothing at the mouth if I wasn’t sitting next to noisy equipment and could actually hear it?